Mackenzie: When John and Kate broke up, I cried.
Lance: Infomercials are NOT awesome.
Johnna: WHAT!? Shake Weight!
Johnna: It's like a hobo habitat.
Me (about the Wizard of Oz): This is always on now.
Dad: That's because kids like it, and they ran out of Christmas shit.
Mom: These earrings make me want to break out in a rendition of Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves.
Dad: Take back all the queer stuff.
Mom: You should be tired. You worked hard.
Mom: Gary Coleman died like three months ago. We had a moment of silence for him. That might not be true.
Mom: Dad thinks that Sherri thinks he's gay.
Nick: Sherri thinks your gay?
Dad: Did you see those shoes?
Me: Name an artist.
Kenny: Leonardo DiCaprio
Lynn: I've been ripped off by a lot of deaf people.
Cromwell: Why do we spend the time burning someone when we could just shoot 'em?
Cromwell: Where are the bicycles- over there. Fuck you.
Lance: This is my squid, and I will call him Squiddy.
Cromwell: His sister: Where are the pictures of my kids?
Cromwell: I have no idea where they are. They're in a box somewhere.
Cromwell: "New York loves him for his oblique pragmatism." What the fuck is oblique pragmatism?
Cromwell: I don't understand this. This is brilliant.
Maeghan about my mugs: Oh they feel special.
Sam: There's not a single mother-fucker at KCAI that's Burt Reynolds.
Cromwell: We'll fuck on the back of the bus, won't we? ... I don't mean YOU people. I mean metaphorically.
Jenn: How's THAT going to work?
Jessica; probably just fine.
David: I was looking at my R2D2 when I woke up and I was wondering if I should open it up and carry it in my pocket as a good luck charm...
David: And Jenn doesn't know shit about art.
Sean: Yeah, I looked it up, Dmitri wouldn't tell me.
Dmitri: I'm committing myself to good ideas this semester.
Mo: It's good to have goals.
Kidwell: And finally.... who is that strange man, and what is he doing here?
Johnna: There will be the occasional black woman, and I'm like, "that's not in Troy."
Luke: I'd eat sand before I ate a baby.
Jason: I'm drunk and weeping. I wouldn't be sarcastic right now.
Dustin: He's not wearing anything.
Kidwell: At first I thought that was Paul Diamond. Not that I know anything about his anatomy...
Jessica: I love him, he covers everything in rhinestones...
Chris: Are you a senior?
Johnna: Yeah are you gonna down grade me some more?
Kidwell: Is that possible?
Kidwell: Hello justification. Are you optically aligning? Nay.
Chris to Dmitri: Maybe it was the typography in your book that made them not want to go into design.
Kidwell: WOooh. Bo-da-bah!
Kidwell: The Museum of Sex they did. Sadly there's no imagery.
Kidwell: I can tell. I'm like Santa.
Kidwell: I can go on for days about sponges.
Dmitri: Let's just face it. You suck at catching things.
Johnna: I can't help it, it's small, hard and misshapen.
Luke starts randomly laughing
Luke: Did you see the kitty on the roof?
Tyler: I tried to frighten you. I was gonna stand behind you until you turned around.
Abigail: Why did you want to frighten me?
Tyler: I thought you'd enjoy it.
Micah to me: You're the cake boss of design.
Kidwell: Don't laugh at this day.
Kidwell to me: What bitch do you want to grind?
Phyllis: Excuse me. I locked my stupid ass out of the office.
Reed hands her his key, She leaves.
Reed: I love Phyllis.
Dmitri: I mean what's he going to do, spank us?
Amanda: Oh my God I hope so.
Dmitri to Sean: If you get nervous and rabbit fuck the shit out of this...
Kidwell: Monument to lost virginity? ...perhaps.
Kidwell about Johnna being late: What do you bet that she comes in, and is like -sigh-?
Chris: Anyone seen Bryan Jones today?
Johnna: He disappears randomly.
Micah: He's a shape-shifter.
Kidwell: Flowers... fish...
Dustin: I wish he wasn't in photo, cuz I miss his body.
Sean: Oh my god, I don't know why I know this.
Johnna: We had this talk last night. You like Celine Dion and white chocolate mochas...
Jenn: I wished my hair produced flowers. I wished my something produced flowers.... wait....
Dmitri: Like "eat your beans today!"
Kidwell: Maybe I need to go to a confessional or something.
Johnna to Sean: Are you gonna get up and dance like a woman?
Kidwell: I think my mom made me a poncho once.
Dustin: That's the sketch for the poncho right there.
Kidwell: Not like that.
Dmitri: I drag the shit out of that.
Tammy: I wanna see you get a running start. That's why we have a runway.
Bryan: Carly I need an answer that only you know. What's the address of this place?
Lance: I can't just say "woah?"
Dmitri: Are you Keanu Reeves?
Kidwell: Good thing it's not completely dark in here and the room's full of knives.
Dustin: You're like the little girl previewing Brittany Spears.
Kidwell: And then there's the Give A Fuck factor.
Kidwell: It's shrimp scampi night at the Kidwell house. At some point your relationship boils down to a schedule.
Kidwell to Jessica: I want to slap you.
Kidwell: Hah haha ha..... asses.
Abigail: So I can start weeding some of these out...
Kidwell: Heh, "weed."
Mo: Lance? Do you have any crackers?
Dmitri: No, no, no. My coffee does not smell like spaghetti-o's.
Dustin: There needs to be a "no fucking way" button.
Kidwell: You guys are going to be industrial designers when you leave, then Sean is going to have to find something else to do with his life.
Sean: What does that mean?
Kidwell: What!? There's the word "sex" in there! Oh my goodness. You can make a project out of anything. Now I understand the lipstick video....
Dmitri to Sean: That IS my pencil! I knew you had it, you bastard!
Mckenzie: My fingers smell like potatoes.
SPRING BREAK QUOTES (3-13 through 3-16)
Micah: I'm in the market for 100 count sheets. It's like sleeping in lotion.
Patrick: That's a fuckin' rat, bra!
Matthew: Let's make a design baby.
Lance (suddenly stops laughing): You have a pickle?
Abigail: These are yours?
Flatstock Printmaker: Yep.
Abigail: Then I think I love you.
Flatstock Printmaker: I love you too, just don't tell my wife.
Kidwell: First day of spring! First day of spring!
Kidwell: Are we waiting for anyone?
Kidwell: So we're not waiting for anyone.
Dustin: Just thinking of the dangers of cold poles...
Kidwell: No, no discourage, no.
Johnna: Pool of jell-o.
Kidwell: I don't get that.... would it be cut in squares?
Kidwell: They didn't have much to do besides pile the rocks.
Abigail: I'm supposed to bring a friend– even if they're kicking and screaming.
Lance: I'll punch you.
Does anyone have an old man dongle?
Mo: Lance does.
Micah: Everyone else would let it go. We see it as opportunities.
Kidwell: Nooo don't touch that. Don't touch it!
Kidwell to Bryan: Now I'm starting to talk like you. I'm getting crazy.
Kidwell: I will never hit you. The bottle of coke flying across the room will hit you.
Kidwell: Anyone else? Micah Barta? Meredith? <- not in class
Kidwell: I can't tell you how many I sit through where they're just like "............. I'm done."
Kidwell: Where's my pointing stick?
Kidwell: Where arrowheads? Where?
Micah: I'm getting gifts left and right. I'm making out like a Mexican police chief.
Kidwell: Do they still pay for blood?
Tyler: You smoke cigars?
Tyler: That's hilarious.
Sean: That's a good song.
Dmitri: I made it up myself.
Sean: My S key is screwed up.
Dmitri: Your S key.... We had this discussion last night. I even said, "Dude, your S key is effed up," and you laughed really hard...?
Kidwell: Have you made anything since we last met?
Mo: I made this.
Kidwell: What the hell is that?
Dustin: I just keep thinking of the word feces... It's my favorite word.
Luke: I said "huh" because I'm deaf and can't read your text.
Dustin: Lance? You can let the people at starbucks know that I am still surprised that there are raisins in my bagel when it's supposed to be multi grain.
Dmitri: Your favorite movie is Bad Boys II. You didn't like Ratatouille. You didn't like Wally. Case and point.
Kidwell: He's brain damaged, isn't he?
Sean: Carly? Do you know where my fucking exactos are?
Carly pulls off her headphones: What?
Sean: How was your day?
Dustin: He's a douche. He said, "booty slappin.'"
Amanda: Look at this bug I just killed
Johnna: Ew! You probably have AIDS.
Dustin: I had a rat that had mites once.
Kat, way too excited: I feel sick inside too!
Kidwell: It's deforming me!
Dustin: It's two-sweater weather, y'all.
Dustin: Doesn't it look like Lance is humping something?
Lance: Looks like my what is what?
Sean to Dmitri, while holding a tape measure: I wonder how far it is from my forehead to your forehead.
Josh Zink: I didn't get a salad. I got an orange.
Johnna: I feed raccoons crackers, but the one has started bringing friends to my house.
Kidwell: Would you know what W is? Water? White?
Me to Sean: Why are you so mock-snippy tonight?
Dmitri: Mock Snippy. Sounds like a rapper name. MS for short.
Johnna: I have to go I have real shit to do tomorrow.
Joe: I have to work.
Johnna: You work at Walmart in the garden center!
Johnna: I always have time to make babies.
Sean: I was going to drive to Blurb headquarters and burn it down.
Johnna: Everything grosses Dustin out, except floppy penises. Which grosses me out and I also like penis.
Bryan stands up to present his and Jessica's project
Kidwell: Why is Bryan doing this?
Johnna: I mean, I have patients. I take care of (...)....
Mo: Brian probably played with rocks.... Lots of rocks.
Tammy: Damn everybody. Everybody's shit.
Kidwell: If you ever want to feel better about your life, go to a hospital.