Sunday, December 12, 2010

Fall Semester Quote List 2010


Kidwell: Look, Pakistan.... still there.

Phyllis: You gave him a book to read?
Michael Bond: Yeah, I thought he was getting a little stupid.

Phyllis: You know what I hate about Russians?

Phyllis: I had a feeling in the 70's and it didn't do a thing for me so I stopped having them.

Phyllis: Catholics are scary, have you ever met one?

Micah: You know what else is addicting? Heroin.

Sean: He thinks Velociraptors sound like this "caw yaw law yaw raw."
Tom: No wonder you got a job at the zoo.

Convocation Speaker: Boys fighting horsey-men

Reed: We really don't have a use for old people.

Reed: Paris Hilton has no talent for anything.

Micah: I could brand cannibalism. You look delicious.

Micah: Abby, I'm very worried that there's a Tom out there without shoes on.

Micah: Yeah, so... I fuck couches in my spare time.

Mark Salmon's wife: Was it dirty?
Lance: Yes.
Mark Salmon's wife: On a scale of one to ten?
Lance: I'd say an eight or nine.

Micah: It's like cheating in an ethics class...

Sean: Hey. Check out this homosexual logo I made.

Micah: I'm just glad I got to put Back to the Future, Indiana Jones, and Gilligan's Island in my presentation.

Bambi- So blood letting.... not a good idea.

Nick: Im pretty sure that the little people from gullivers travels don't appreciate you touching their shit...

Sean: I'll Old Yeller that in a second.

Kidwell: It bothers my wife because she says it sounds like a creepy Peewee Herman.

Evan: ...and these drunk ass girls-...... I'm just going to say bitches....

Evan: What the fuck? Where are my pants?

Will: We're willing to break the law for our customers.... well really it's more like a situational alliance of restriction.

Stuart: I'm going to plant a fuckload of trees.

Stuart: Everything could fail but it could still be really beautiful.

Jason: everyone else online right now I dont care about, so I ask you.

Kidwell: I don't tuck their portfolio under my pillow and say, "Oh gee. Someday... someday..."

Tyler: If you think you're going into this culture to fix what's wrong with it... Well I mean... that's what we did to the natives.

Derek: Piss and grits!

Luke: It's like I'm drinking Dr Pepper!

Dylan: I don't even know what a magnet is.

Luke: I want some beer mmmm.... and maybe some peanuts.

Jason: Knowledge and wisdom are both elegent and desireable ways to ascend to godhood.

Aaron: The first rule of community garden is you do not talk about community garden.

Johnna to me: Bring it, Sissy Sally!

Sean: Neither are Koreans, but they don't have a choice.

Me: Meow
Luke: Dammit

Mo: She's gonna make you cry. I'm gonna love it.

Marty: I thought it was a piece of lettuce and I was really confused.

Sean: Oh man, this tastes like dandelions.

Tyler: I love hotpockets.

Tyler: I'm a dirty lady.

Tyler (about four-square iphone app): Tom just checked into the adult cinema!

Kidwell: It's good for your digestion. Everyone needs a little regulation.

Micah: Know where I buy my cereal? Sharper Image.

Lisa: how do you pronounce that?
Lance: Good Luck.
Lisa: That's your answer?

Kidwell about Johnna's pinup girl poster: Can I have this? That's not appropriate is it... So with a clear conscious and a clean mind...

Kidwell: Instead of a run of the mill Kauffman thing...

Luke made a joke.
Kidwell: Crickets.

Micah: KCAI: We still give high-fives here.

Micah: Do you have a faerie god mother?
Abby: No but some of the girls made wands today.
Micah: You just ruined my joke.

Micah: It's ruining my sitting-naked-in-a-bean-bag-chair-eating-cheetos-and-watching-family-guy time.

KB: Girls, this is ridiculous. It smells like turkey legs.

Kat: Ma'am? Your tail's getting wet...

Mo: You can't sit there, Johnna and I are going to cuddle
Tyler: Johnna and I are going to cuddle. Sean and Luke can cuddle.
Mo: Man cuddle.

Tyler: Well from one perspective they look like carp. From one perspective, I don't care.

Tyler: Unless it's a magazine about sheep dogs or something....

Tyler: Contextualityized

Tyler: Design nuggets
Sean: Diz-uggets

Stuart: This might be super romantic and might take a few leaps of faith to get there...

Stuart: As artists, we're fucked.

Reed: But they still see vaginas. Figure that out.

Reed: I do love youtube, though.

Jason: You're not being insulted it's endearing

Kidwell: I don't have anyone proofreading this for me. I sit at home with my cat.

Kidwell: That was a weird trip wasn't it? Started with a project sheet and ended in Hong Kong.

Johnna: Let's send someone like Tom that he can't say no to.

Luke: You should be my friend. Can we have friends?

Jenn: I don't like tacos like women.

Luke: Kidwell's out in public?

Luke: It's like a pine forest and blue cheese.

Kidwell: I'm trying to figure out how much beer I can drink in three hours.

Micah: I wasn't born; I was designed.

Micah: I can sing every damn word of every fucking song in that movie, and I'm going to.

Luke: So I'm a total failure and I got really hung up on the name this weekend...
Kidwell: does the drunk symbol for drunk.

Kidwell: The Michelin Man, I've always been in love with the Michelin man. Not in a physical sense. He doesn't have a nose.

Kidwell: some of you will learn to hate environmental graphics. Here's a reason why you can't.

Kidwell: We're in Tibet
Luke: That's an awesome roller coaster.
Kidwell: Shut up.

Kidwell: There's ears with gears and there's ears with beers!

Johnna: She already hates us.
Sean: She hates you.

Kidwell: The first class.... there's something wrong with the first class.

Kidwell: Blood water? That's fun.

Kidwell: What's you're name Johnna?
Johnna: Sacajawea.

Kidwell: The mark was changed.... to protect the innocent.

Dmitri: The next person to say "shenanigans" is going to get pistol whipped.

Tyler: Anyone have anything to say to possibly anger your classmates, Abby?

Tyler: I think you should call it the "V truck" and put a bunch of male dancers in the back.

Tammy: You didn't lick it did you?

Dustin: Tammy? Are you huffing?

Kidwell: This is from the Lowlife... well... the other class.

Kidwell, pokes my arm and smiles: Touchpoint.

Johnna: I just need to stand up, my ass is numb.
Kidwell: Bad touch point eh?

Tom: Bring on the presentation Midget.

Sean: I was so cold I had to put tights on this morning.

Kidwell: I've never seen a storm drain so hellatious. It's like a troll lived down there or something.

Kidwell: Cute little black bars going over people's eyes like they're in an old porn magazine.

Kidwell: What are you smirking at?
Me: This "shoot yeah" comment.
Kidwell: That was for you. It sounded like something you'd say almost.

Dmitri: Just plug it into my belly button.

Mo: Let's just combine all of the groups.
Sean: Except for Bryan's.

AJ: Excuse me while I tune my string.

Mo: That's what happens when you live alone.
Kidwell: He lives alone? -whines-
-luke walks in-
Kidwell: Your roommate didn't wake you up this morning? Oh that's right.

Mo: Here's my puppy.
Kidwell: It looks like a wild creature. Like a bear cub or something.... or like a wolverine.

Mo: Someone pushed a cart down the road.
Kidwell: What kind of sound would that be?
Johnna: Hobo?

Micah: He's pregnant, Abby!

Lady checking Sean's ID: Well he looks like a baby.

Kidwell hypothetically to Tyler: Come here buddy, I don't want to put my hand around your waist.

Micah: I thought I kicked a turtle.

Tyler: Marlboro. Get the Good Cancer.
Sean: Smooth as Cancer.

Tammy: I'm angry about it and I want to take people down.

Nick: I didn't know you started wearing underwear again.

Dad: Go somewhere that sells queer stuff like that.
Mom: What does that make you?
Dad: I guess I got queer needs.

Bambi: So... How many of you have friends?

Bambi: Yeah I just say the mean words in my head.

Kidwell: Tom? Are you doing Mr. T?
Tom: I am Mr. T.

Mo: Quit your bitchin'
Kidwell: And get in the kitchen.... excuse me, I lived in the south for a number of years. No offense to anyone that lived in the south. I don't want to get in trouble.
Sean: Now you need to hug us all.

Tammy: This is Tom. He rides unicycles.

Dustin: If Kidwell doesn't like this, I'm going to dump out his Altoids tin.

Mo: If you're too straight there's something wrong with you.
Dustin: That's what I've always said.

Tom: Did you get a lot done?
Me: Nope.
Micah: I found a crunch berry under my couch.

Mo: What if we haven't put it on the cas?
Kidwell, out of sight, from far away: Please do it!
Mo: How does he always hear me?
Kidwell, still far away: You have a beautiful voice.

Sean: I forgot about that.
Kidwell: Dumb ass.

Kidwell: Or whatever you kids do today.
Sean: Mostly drugs.
Kidwell: Shut up.

Kidwell: Oh my goodness. Shit.

Kidwell: Did you get a flea shot cuz I did, so don't hit me.
Me: Why did you get a flea shot?
Kidwell: Because I come in contact with children.

Johnna: The worst thing that happens is we disappoint her.

Kidwell: You know what sounds good? An ice cream sandwich. Like three of 'em.

Michelle, deciding she needed a break from work, to Kirk: I have to go to Cost-co to get ingredients for Sangria.

Me: Why is she sleeping?
Micah: She stayed up all night reading the bible.

Mom: You really don't want to say "bosom, mom, and hump" all in the same sentence.

Armin Vit: Then it's bath-time, then it's story-time and I read the same fucking story... I love my kids, but Jesus Christ. It's the same story. Don't you kids GET it?

Armin Vit: They didn't know what to do. They're used to old ladies coming in for kitty stamps or whatever.
Armin Vit: It's a pseudonym I use to do evil things online.

Armin Vit: It's not like we're jumping up and down on our bed with 100 dollar bills and cocaine...

Amanda: When you were talking about your project I started thinking about myself.

Reed: A lot of you said you wanted to have a career and a family but weren't sure you could have both... You can. Well first you have to find a mate...

Reed: Abby was the only one that said the world "selfish" and didn't think of it as a bad thing.

Rob: No one wants to keep track of their lipids. 


Luke: Diabetes robot.

Luke: I'm almost so drunk I can't chew.

Sean: Extreme awkwardness is my business, Chris, and business is booming!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Book Design

Hammerpress Test Print Cover, approx 5" by 5.5"
Recycled Chipboard Cover, approx. 5.5" by 7" with half inch spine

Both smaller books have a Recycled Starbucks Bag Cover, approx 3" by 5" with an approx. quater inch spine

All books make great holiday gifts. I can do any number of pages up to 200, any size up to 8.5 by 11 inches, black, white or silver eyelets or none, white or black thread, spine tape binding or not, white or off white paper. Covers are negotiable (solid cover, recycled material, specialty paper, etc.). Shoot me an email if you're interested (